I wrote last year about how nursing in church for the first time was a huge thing for me. I felt like all sorts of awful things would happen once I lifted my shirt and latched baby on. As it turned out, nothing at all happened. Well, except that the baby stopped crying and I felt pretty proud of myself.
Well it’s that time of the year again and I can’t help but think about all the places and times that it is so awkward to nurse during the holiday season. No wonder that holiday weaning is a major problem!
And I don’t mean just those public places that you might have to nurse during the holidays. For me the most awkward nursing occasions are parties with family and friends. Give me a bench at the Avalon Mall, next to an old man, on December 23, with crowds of angry people, and I’ll sit down and nurse my toddler no problem at all. It’s the family dinner parties that kill me.
Lifting my shirt and popping baby on in front of great-aunt so and so, old uncle what’s- his- name, and female- relative- number- one- who- weaned- her- baby- at- two- weeks, takes so much courage that sometimes I am unable to summon enough. I dread the “You’re still going at that, huh?”, “Isn’t she weaned yet?”, “Get her cup of milk for god’s sakes!” etc. All these things make me want to crawl into a hole in the ground.
The thing is that the strangers at the mall likely won’t say anything to me and if they do I can easily give a saucy reply. In fact, in all of the hundreds of public places around Newfoundland that I’ve breastfed over the last four and a half years, I’ve never had one single rude comment directed my way.
But, it isn’t so anonymous with the family. They feel that they have a right or duty to comment and I feel I owe them an explanation.
The strange thing is that I feel angry at myself for feeling this way. After all, every woman has the right to make her own decisions about how to feed her baby. Nobody judges female –relative- number -one when she hauls out a bottle to feed her baby. Everyone (including me) thinks she’s an awesome mom.
Nobody asks her why she stopped breastfeeding so early or when her baby is going to give up the bottle.
I just wish there was a level playing field.
My trick for getting through these awkward times: I close my eyes as I latch baby on and I imagine that I live in a world where it is perfectly normal for me to be nursing my child in this setting. I act surprised if someone comments. I smile and I try to relax. After all, if I want to live in such a world I can’t just wait for it to magically appear; I have to make it happen.
How do you get through the holidays while nursing your baby?
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and your families!
Felicie is a teacher turned work at home mama to two busy little angels, aged 22 months and 4 and a half years. She is a proud member of La Leche League Canada and has helped to organize three World B[..]
